Mumpreneurship

Recently, I was featured in Vibes, a quarterly published community magazine, alongside 4 other amazing mumpreneurs living in the same area. Even though all 5 of us come from different backgrounds, have different ambitions and in different line of work, the one thing we can all unanimously agree on is that being a mumpreneur entails on being a mother first before our work undertakings.

I believe we thrive on the flexibility that our role offers, which allow us to give our utmost best to our family and what we are passionate about pursuing, at the same time. Over time and perseverance, we are each at where we want to be (and more!) which makes raising our families' and running a business, a very meaningful journey to hold on to.

Zooming in on my write up! but please believe me, I didn't endorse myself as a 'popular mum blogger'. It was purely the perception of the magazine's interviewer.

At the blink of an eye, it has already been 11 years since I ventured into providing handmade jewelry service online. To find out more about what I have been up to all these years, you can read more about my journey as a jewelry crafter here.

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Thank you everyone, for your continued support to local mumpreneurs, in big and small ways! 

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Do connect with us individually, should the need for our services arise :

Adeline's Loft
Custom made lifestyle jewelry
Who : Adeline Oon (me!)
Blogshop : www-ade.loft.blogspot.com
Facebook : www.facebook.com/adelines.loft
Instagram : www.instagram.com/adeoon
Pinterest : www.pinterest.com/adelineoon/
Twitter : www.twitter.com/AdelineOon

Petite Bake House
Bakery and Customized Cakes
Who : Sophia Loy
Website : www.petitebakehouse.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/PetiteBakehouse
Pinterest: www.pinterest.com/sophialoy/
Instagram: www.instagram.com/loysophia/
Twitter: mobile.twitter.com/PetiteBakehouse

LearnMojo
Online Tuition for Secondary School (Social Studies/History)
Who : Karen Ang
Website : www.learnmojo.com

Philosoulphy
Personal Growth and Transformational Coach
Who : Ruth Wong
Facebook : www.facebook.com/PhilosoulphyWithRuth

Nails & Brows
Beauty Salon
Who : Jenny Wee
Website : www.nailsandbrows.com

Facebook : www.facebook.com/NailsandBrows/ 

and www.facebook.com/TressesbyNailsandBrows/

  Till the next post, have a wonderful day!

Absolutely Me,

It's A Wrap For 2015!

2015 has been a fruitful year in my personal undertakings. There are countless things that I am inspired to embark on and I am satisfied that I have ticked (and attempted) several on my to-do list which I never dreamt I would!

In my humble kitchen, I shared on instagram my first chiffon cake baking adventure (using Domestic Goddess Wannabe's recipe).  4 different chiffon cakes flavor later, I am pretty sure that I have gotten the hang of baking it. Call me strange but I found the process of egg whites beaten to soft peaks simply gratifying! And yuzu flavored chiffon cake remains a personal favourite.

Then there was my successful 'Dry Mee Siam' which remains a favourite dish, my quest for 'jiu herh' (cuttlefish) that led me to making 'Rojak', the oh-so-easy-to-make-and-super-delicious 'Peach and Blueberries Melba Cake', 'Baked Tonkatsu' which is great for the health-conscious and one highly viewed recipe on the blog. Last but not least, I recently made 'Irish Cream Tiramisu' and am so pleased how it turned out because I never thought I could churn out an 'atas' tasting dessert! These recipes are not only comfort food for us at home, they are also great recipe ideas for get togethers.

On the jewelry work front, I am very grateful and thank God for His constant supply. 2015 is definitely a year for bag charms and lanyard request, which make wonderful gifts. Though not forgetting the requests for 'Adeline's Loft' trademark necklace styles that will always remain a favourite for those who appreciate them.

Here is a collage of some of my favourite pieces I have made for 2015.  Do visit my facebook page album for the full upload of all the pieces I made this year.

Last but not least, the other highlight of my 2015 would be pledging my work to The Collective Effort. I am very happy to have played my part in paying it forward and brought some smiles to the less privileged children in Singapore. You could still read my dedicated blog post on what this project is about or simply check out their Facebook page for photos of happy faces that says it all!

Here's taking the opportunity to wish my family, friends and readers :

A Very Merry Christmas with

blessings of peace, love and good health.

May you also have a fabulous 2016 with all your dreams coming true! 

Till next year, have a wonderful day!

Absolutely Me,

I Will Protect My Integrity

From the people who know me (family or non-family) or worked with me, I am not a brash nor an irrational person. Sometimes, I allow myself to be a pushover for the reason of not wanting to stir ill-feelings with anyone. A few know I put up with matters that bother me big-time and take all the blows for the sake of keeping peace.

As Confucius said,

“Don't do unto others what you don't want others to do unto you.”

I  live by this mantra as much as possible, however, I can't say that everyone else will sing to the same tune.

When it comes to committing to a task that you are not prepared to undertake, there will be unnecessary stress and unhappiness that comes with it. Sometimes, it is just a matter of putting your loved ones' priorities first, if it means more to them. However, most times, your acts of respect or kindness goes unnoticed, unappreciated and worst of all, misunderstood. I have learned to somewhat manage to live and let live. God knows my heart. Having close friends to listen to my woes and providing me with emotional support, helps me overcome the temporary animosity too.

Recently, I was very taken aback by a customer's reaction to my decision not to take on a clay bead making order. As my initial quotations were not accepted during the first few times she inquired many months ago, I cited my present commitment to a jewelry making project and also expressed my desire to cease taking in clay bead making requests as much as possible, when she asked me about it again. Instead of respecting my decision, she lashed out her disappointment with me by questioning my integrity.

In the course of my work in the past 8 years, though there have been difficult customers, there was none that was this overbearing. Naturally, my integrity took a beating and it took me some time to get back to my feet because I believe it plays a major role in sustaining my little business. I would never think of ditching this part of me that has brought me to where I am. I have never been unscrupulous.

Despite apologizing toward the way she feels about my decision and hoping for understanding toward my stance, I was harshly reminded to be humble and criticized for allowing success to get into my head. It has never occurred to me that a simple declination could bring about such malignment about me. I am saddened that this customer bore such bitter resentment toward me, even though this is not the first time I am working with her. I don't know if I should be the one disappointed in her, than her with me. It sure felt like it was a personal attack.

"You don't have to explain yourself to her." 

- said one of my buddies whom I confided into. 

Well, it is because I value my integrity and would protect myself at all costs. It would be very unwise of me to take on a job which I have no heart for because it would be reflected in the end product - my standards will be compromised. That is not something I would want in my undertakings as a crafter/seller. I have to believe in what I do in order to produce my best.

I sincerely hope that my customer has somewhat calmed down and perhaps realize that the inflictions she has caused, was uncalled for and a mistake. It may have taken just 10 minutes to lose this customer of mine (I would think I lost her), but I am so glad that I did not lose myself over this. I am pretty sure I did the right thing and would not change my decision even if I could turn back the clock.

So thank you once again, my friends, family and supporters of my craft, for believing in what I do, for coming back to me to make you more jewelry creations and endorsing me with your referrals. It has been a humbling experience.

Moving on, gambatte to me!

  Till the next post, have a blessed week!

Why Handmade Costs More.

How often do you come across someone who is an independent crafter from home and tells you it is their only source of income? Perhaps not many of you have and realistically not something we can survive on in Singapore. I am privileged to be acquainted with a few of these artists who are mostly from the USA and Israel, where crafting can be a way of life. Personally for me, being a crafter is mainly to support my passion for jewelry making more than anything else.

I won't deny, the extras I have often come as a bonus for a stay-at-home-mom like me. It is usually more than enough to pay for my daughter's ballet classes. Something I told her that I would see through, as my way of contributing to the family's expenses. Not that we cannot afford it. It's just a sense of self-worth on my part to be able to do so - if you know what I mean.

8 years since I've been on the crafting scene, I think I may have heard it all.

"Your pieces are expensive."

"You must be some kind of tai-tai (a.k.a. rich) to upkeep this hobby of yours."

"I can get a similar one cheaper from elsewhere."

"Please quote a bulk price discount since I'm buying a few pieces from you."

Though these comments do not usually come through often (thank God!), it is quite enough for any crafter to remember them for a long time. After a while, it does get under your skin.

I can understand that such comments may have been derived from lack of awareness on running an independent crafting business from home. So I felt the need to come out with this post and share the general amount of time spent on my creation. (I briefly wrote in a previous post about what my handmade is worth. However, this post should put things better in perspective about the pricing behind a work you buy.)

Generally, we price what we feel is worth the time invested in making a unique piece. We also have to think about other hidden costs apart from the material cost - packaging and communicating. Communication is a provision of service too and generally, people do have to pay for services. For some, hidden costs may also be maintenance of a website domain, fancy packaging as well as paying for an assistant who may be working alongside with him or her, to cope with demands.

 STEP 1 : CONSULTATION / MOCK UP DESIGN

There are actually many things that crafters do not put a tag on before we work on a final price. Depending on what kind of work we do, some would involve sketching and specific researching of raw materials before embarking on a design a customer wants.

I don't charge for consultation and mocking up designs. Consultation here would mean receiving queries about how to dress up a particular outfit and share my opinions about what sort of jewelry will be suitable. Or give advise on a theme that my customers' can consider if its to gift someone else based on their description of that person. How do I even begin to charge for something that my customer has not seen?

This is a grey area and most time consuming step of all. I would only start incorporating extra charges into the acceptance of a design IF there's extreme and erratic changes from what was originally discussed. Usually I would also ask for a deposit to secure an order, depending how familiar I am with the buyer. There are some that disappear altogether despite being so close to finalizing it over many days of communicating. But thank God again, these encounters are of a minority.

More often than not, I do not charge for transport to various supply shops in Singapore to source for specific requests from my customers. I would usually take it as an opportunity to get out of the house for a breather and stock up some necessary supplies on the way. Imagine if I have to start charging for my time and transport, there will be no end!

Time spent on communication and mocking up designs before approval can sometimes take a few hours or even over a few days. I shall use the quickest time of about 180 minutes to finalize an order.

STEP 2 : PUTTING IT TOGETHER

This is generally the most straightforward part of my work, although it can sometimes take longer than usual if the technical part gets tricky. I take between 10-90 minutes to complete a creation, depending on complexity. I shall use 30 minutes as the average time of completing a piece.

STEP 3 : PHOTOGRAPHY

Photo taking is also another process you may not think I spend much on. It is actually the most important step to selling an item online because picture speaks a thousand words. I sometimes spend 15 minutes shooting 20-30 frames (with an aching back!), just to get that one ideal shot. Then there is editing time, the listing of the image to my store and uploading on social medias, which easily takes another 20 minutes.
 

STEP 4 : INSPECTION AND PACKAGING

When an item is sold and transacted for, I will do a final inspection before packaging it to make sure every single loop is intact. Though my packaging is minimalist style, there are still costs to factor :

- The name card that goes into every package with how to care for your jewelry
- the plastic pouch to store the jewelry
- the bubble-wrappers to protect the jewelry pieces from hard knocks during transition at the post office
- the envelopes, stamps and adhesives.

This step would probably take 10 minutes.

 STEP 5 : MAILING

I offer free mail for local packages via standard postage, which is a hidden cost in each item. The time taken to mail is just but a 10 minute walk for me. I used to stand in line at the post office when a package requires registered mail service. Sometimes it can take more than half and hour before it's my turn. That would also include a 20 minutes bus ride (to and fro) and bus fares. Or if I decide to drive, parking fee is no less than S$2. I shall use 10 minutes as time taken for mail since many choose to go by standard mail.

***Adding up on the above highlighted time spent on one creation, it is a modest grand total of 255 minutes (slightly more than 4 hours) to complete and send out a piece of jewelry.***

As I may have mentioned, it is difficult for me to charge for work time. So, I've chosen to incorporate a fix amount to cover for each type of jewelry, which should also be enough to cover for my workmanship.

If I may represent the voices of every crafter, we seek buyers' understanding that like every other human being, we have only a pair of hands. We do not mass produce and we cannot quote a "bulk price" discount because we don't churn things out with a snap of our fingers. Many of us believe in creating one-of-a-kind pieces that is not offered at retail stores, nor at a flea market. And the difference is that we care about the quality, details in our handmade pieces and we care about customer service - that is you!

I really hope I've made things clearer for those who have been wondering why you have to pay a little more for handmade items. (Though I'll have to say mine is pretty darn reasonable already!) We hope you'll be more appreciative of the things you buy from your favorite handmade artists when you next shop for one.

**This post is dedicated to my undying supporters of my creations at Adeline's Loft. Kudos to you for believing in my work!**

Since we're in the topic of handmade artists, how about visiting and supporting a few of my favorite ones?

Jeanstitch (Singapore)

Scrappin' Love (Singapore)

Janine King Designs (USA)

Sigaliot (Israel)

  Till the next post, have a blessed week!

Urticaria, Angelina Jolie and Me

Urticaria, also known as hives, is a common skin condition and according to the specialist I had consulted, it happens to 7 out of 10 people. But what's not so common for me is that I have been diagnosed with acute urticaria. The only bad news for me is that it may last me for many more months or even years to get it resolved.

Urticaria causes redness, itch and swelling to the skin. It varies in sizes and usually erupts in clusters or appears in a large patch on any part of the body.  If there are further swelling on the eyelids or lips, it is all together a different term - angioedema. Unfortunately, I have been experiencing both kinds.

Unglam photos of me with swollen lips on different occasions, which doesn't come down till night time or next morning. Initially, I experienced severe itch and swelling on my hands, palms, feet and fingers. The past few weeks however, it has affected basically any part of my body.
 

What causes it?

Causes of trigger for urticaria may include allergies to food, insect bites or medicines. However in my diagnosis, the specialist has ruled out allergies and pinpointed that acute urticaria is caused by a leftover viral infection that was not 100% cleared from my body. Thus the immune system tries to eradicate these viruses by releasing the histamine into the blood stream to fight it off, which causes the swelling.

How will it affect me?

It definitely has been a distressing time for the past 2 1/2 months, since the condition came on. It has caused me many sleepless nights as the breakout of urticaria usually happens when I am asleep. So I get very tired by mid-day especially when I have to take anti-histamines. However, I am thankful that it is somewhat in control as I've read that there are severe life threatening cases caused by breathing difficulty, since the swelling may occur in the tongue or throat. I'm also relieved that it is not a sign of any underlying medical conditions.
 

What can I do about it?

I can only wait for this to clear up with medication prescribed to me and go back to the specialist for further investigation if it still persists after 6 weeks. I am already on my fourth week of prescription but in my opinion, I am not experiencing any form of improvement yet. I am praying for a full recovery on this soon.

So what has Angelina Jolie got to do with me?

I'm not a fan of hers, really. But I think in my situation, this is as close I can get to having an itty bitty resemblance in the lip area. Yes? No? 

Though I dread having a break out of urticaria everyday, mopping around certainly will not help me recover any quicker. So I'm keeping the faith that I will have a complete recovery from this episode in no time. And preferably after the end of my 6th week medication, I will be back in form!

 
Till the next post, have a blessed week!

Our Reunion Dinner Tradition

 

Apart from our casual get-together for dinner, we make it a point as a family, to meet with our elders and siblings for meals during important occasions. There is certainly no exception when it comes to the reunion dinner during Chinese New Year's eve, as we gather to usher in the new year together, for happiness and prosperity for every member of the family. It is the simplest form of family tradition that I personally cherish and hope to instill this importance to my children, so that they learn the values that has been passed down from generation to generations.What makes our reunion dinner more joyous is having the extended family (aunts, uncles and cousins) join us for this important dinner at the home shared by my mother-in-law and sister-in-law. It certainly makes a good celebratory atmosphere!

Food is, no doubt, an integral part in our Chinese new year celebrations. A s I am married into a traditional Cantonese family, the home cooked food that is prepared during reunion dinner are often "auspicious" dishes. Here are some of the significant dishes we had.

 "Yu Sheng" or raw fish salad. In Cantonese, they would call it "lao yu sang". This dish, represented by the above Chinese phrase, "feng sheng shui qi", brings forth success, prosperity and vitality towards the family, the whole year through. The higher you toss, the better it gets!

In Cantonese, prawns are pronounced as "har". So it is very apt that the above phrase "ha ha da xiao", brings forth laughter and joy for the family throughout the year.

"Fatt Choy" - or prosperity, as the black moss seaweed is called. It is usually braised with dried oysters with black mushrooms, however, the one you see here is with sea cucumber, which is pronounced as "hoi sum" in Cantonese, meaning "happiness". You would be able to guess the significance behind this dish - yes! It is for all to have wealth and happiness throughout the year!  

A snap shot of our extended family, tossing "yu sheng" at my mother-in-law's home!

 

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What does reunion dinner means to you?

Watch this heartwarming video clip by the National Family Council (NFC), showing realistic stories and thoughts about what some Singaporeans think about reunion dinners.  Through this video, NFC hopes to encourage everyone to reflect on the significance of family reunions and spend more time with our loved ones, creating memories and building stronger bonds.

With the reunion theme in mind, the National Family Council is organizing contests in relation to Chinese New Year reunion dinners and the significance it has for different people. Share your thoughts at their facebook page and stand to win attractive prizes!

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  From our family to yours, we wish you :  

"家和万事兴"  (jia he wan shi xing) Meaning : A harmonious family will prosper.  And may all blessings be upon you and your family throughout the year of the horse.   Till the next post, have a blessed week!

Disclaimer : The Accidental Mom Blogger was invited to share the objective of the National Family Council. My family and I support it's vision to foster stronger family ties in Singapore.  A token of appreciation was presented to us for writing this post. 

I'm Happy! And I'm a Singaporean!

Have you seen the recent controversial video about Steph Micayle? (or Stephanie Koh, if you must know her real name) If you've not seen the video, I recommend you spend about 15 minutes of your time to hear what this young lady has to say about her not being proud to be a Singaporean. Perhaps then you'll see why this blog post came to be. But, it's also okay if you do not wish to add to her numbers.

I shall not debate about why I am proud or not proud to be a Singaporean. But I would like to reason a few points close to my heart that were brought up in the video, which did not go down so well with me.

No country is perfect in their system. There will always be people finding fault with theirs because it doesn't serve their specific needs.  But let's give the government more credit than they deserve. It is not reasonable to fault how a country should run if you are not qualified to run it. Though I am not inclined to agree on every rule and regulation in my country, I am also certainly not one who will rebel.

As a mature adult, I understand that a system is in place to hold Singapore together and for it's people to have a common bond. Simple reasoning. Since we are born and bred here, we should learn to live with it and deal with it. It's the same wherever you may relocate to. You have to abide the law.

 

In every country, in every race, in every organization and sometimes even within the family, there are some black sheeps. A few black sheeps do not represent the majority of people.

 In every society, there are also different type of personalities, upbringing and values. Maybe some choose to be narrow minded because it's a challenge not to be one. Maybe some don't want to be nice because they happen to have a bad day. Maybe some gave up trying to be creative because they lost their patience. Maybe some are submissive to maintain harmony and some are just unhappy because they are finding fault with everything but themselves! There are also the MAJORITY of us who are not like that. It's unfair to say that most Singaporeans are not nice. I know plenty of nice Singaporeans!

I've always liked to give the benefit of the doubt so I feel, kindness do exist in everyone. In Singapore, I observe that we generally impart random acts of kindness to strangers when it is being called for and I am quite confident that many adult Singaporeans will step in to help one another in need. Kindness is evidently growing. Spread the kindness like it's second nature instead of killing it with self-righteousness and point fingers at others expecting them to be the same. That is arrogance and certainly, not very nice. (Sorry but I had to add this : having someone run after you from afar to ask if the computer you dropped is okay, is an act of a nosey-parker. #justsaying)

In other words, let's stop nitpicking about how "bad our system is" or "how strict the law is". Singapore is already on the right track, listening to people on the ground. Give Singapore more time. It may not be much for everyone but it will impact those that matter. There is no "one size fits all" policy. Our country is doing our best so we should lend a hand. If we can't lend a hand, hush up. Let's respect her, enjoy the simple pleasures of life and peace she has to offer that many often take for granted.

 Do you have something to say about being a Singaporean? Do you beg to differ my thoughts? Come and share your thoughts with me and link up if you are a blogger or leave a comment in this post. I would love to know what Singapore means to you and your family. I also welcome thoughts about Singapore if you are an expatriate living here or have visited Singapore. Copy and paste the code below at the end of your blog post and link up!  

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 Till the next post, have a blessed week!

2013 - A Year of Gratitude

As I get older, I am more mindful of the little things in life that truly matters to me. One of the most essential to "living life to the fullest", is choosing (as much as I can) to stay positive and think of the happy moments instead of focusing on the negative ones. I've always believed that happy thoughts generate happy cells in one's body. Sicknesses are somehow kept at bay and happy vibes infects people around you too. Happiness is truly not something you can place a price tag on.

Looking back at 2013, there are many little things I am grateful for that made my year a memorable one.

• Watching my 13 year old son gain some independence after starting secondary school. I can now run my necessary errands and leave him to come home on his own and settle his own meals. It is a little load off my mind.
• My husband and I celebrated 16 years of marriage. Though we've never celebrated it in any fanciful or romantic way, I am happier that he takes the time to plan and take the family for a few short getaways this year. Vacation time with the family often means a lot more to me than one candle light dinner.
• Reminding myself why I love what I do - keeping my lifestyle jewelries creations affordable. It's really not about the money, money, money! It's the passion that keeps what I do, alive.
• I had my first makeover! Well only on the face but there was much to learn from the session hosted by Florinda. It was a fantastic time spent with women I know!
• I never thought there will be a day that I will gather ingredients and prepare an oreo mud pie! If not for my little girl's request, I don't think I would. I hope she realizes that the little things I do for her is out of love.
• Now, if you know me, I am TOTALLY NOT a night owl. But for a late night date with my hubby, I did it. We went for an extraordinary date to Senoko Fishery Port!
• The kids and I also made out debut on TV for a programme interview on why I blog. Even though the airtime was very short, it was the experience that mattered.

As we usher in 2014 in a few hours, I pray for peace, health and happiness to continue to reign within the family. And a special wish to all my readers for the same blessings for your families too.

Cheers to 2014!

 

  Till the next post, have a blessed week!

Behind The Scene of My TV Debut - On The Red Dot

I was recently contacted via email by one of Channel NewsAsia's producer, Sian Choo, who was doing research on a story about "Sharenting" for a local programme called "On The Red Dot". She requested for a phone interview with me, hoping that I could help fill her in with information about why I blog. I obliged. 

Perhaps why I started blogging intrigued her because the reason was clearly the peer influence. Yes! The mums in Singapore Mom Bloggers are surely an influential lot! From someone who has lost touch with writing in a diary for more than 20 years, the thought of journalling my moments for all to see seemed daunting. However, I'm very happy where my blogging adventure has taken me for the past 19 months. 

A few days after the phone interview, Sian Choo called me up again. This time, it became clearer. She wanted me to be interviewed on TV!  I declined to do the TV interview a couple of times, asking her if she can somehow incorporate my story into the program without me appearing on TV. But, her sincerity won me over. I thought, since it was not something I would do as a norm and for the experience sake, why not?

Sian Choo and the filming crew, fussing over me as they were setting up the lighting and sound.

The particular story Sian Choo was covering focused on parents who blog, tweet and post pictures of their lives. Particularly with children. She wanted to know why we blog and what was it that we want to share with the world. 

So, being the kind of person who likes to plan and not really liking any surprises (ok lah, kiasi), I asked her for a list of questions she would be asking me about. So I diligently typed out my answers and printed it on paper for my reference, just in case I had to because I didn't want to be stumped. Here were her questions and my answers.

How did your blog first started, and  why?  

Actually I started a photoblog in March last year and was searching for a like-minded group in Facebook to share with when I chanced upon this newly set up facebook group for Singapore Mom Bloggers. I was very surprised to discover many mom bloggers journaling their children’s milestones, sharing their challenges and snippets of their lives.  A month down the road, I got influenced, in a good way.  So I decided to start a blog, thus my blog name - The Accidental Mom Blogger.

What do you usually like to blog about, and why?

I usually blog about matters close to my heart. The challenges I face as a stay-at-home-mom, the building of relationships with my children and sharing memories of my own growing up years. Sometimes I also have a say on trending issues in Singapore like education or on social graces. Other times, I share my simple home cooked recipes or journal about my jewelry crafting. Blogging has become an outlet for me to express my feelings and at the end of the day, it’s all about sharing my experience. Perhaps another mom who is reading a particular post can relate with me, pick up a tip or two and know they are not alone in their challenges.

  

Do your children know about your blog?

Oh yes they do. If it’s a post that concerns them, I would make them read it to see my point of view. Hopefully they will understand why I do what I do. If not now, then in the future when they are facing with parenting challenges. My blog would serve as a reference for them.

Hmmm, this is probably one of the rare times when my dining table is cleared of my work barang barang!

How are their response & reactions so far?

Initially, it was not something they were comfortable about but they kind of warmed up (or I would like to think they do) to my blogging adventure so we’re all quite okay now. There is definitely a trust that's been built on what I will share and what I will not.

And KayCee the dog becomes an overnight star, with tricks she earnestly performed for the camera!

 What are some of the things you will definitely not post?

I will certainly not post sensitive issues that would hurt my family, extended families and friends. 

How do you draw the line between what’s private & public?  

I am mindful not to divulge any intimate and embarrassing details of myself or anyone in the family – unless it’s meant to be tongue-in-cheek. So topics like revealing specific exam scores or about my children reaching puberty are a no-no for me. If I have to write a post similar to these topics, I would generalize the content.

Are you aware of digital footprints? Do you think your children will be affected by your blog sharing?

As long as I maintain a positive attitude when I blog about the challenges with my children, I believe it will not affect their lives. I am aware that what I share online is searchable, but what I share is also real to me. It is a part and parcel of growing up in Singapore and I believe many Singaporean parents can relate. What I write about my children now is not reflective of how they will contribute to society in the future. So I do not think it poses a problem. 

There. Sounded simple? It wasn't. And you know what? It didn't really matter what I typed out in the list of questions given to me. I was stumped anyway! I think typing out my thoughts are much easier than when I speak it out.

 Although I was the least bit nervous (very unlike me though I fidgeted over my unrefined looking hair and wondered all the time if Rosli, the cameraman, was filming a flattering side of my face or focusing on my tummy), it was the repeated necessary interruption (the N.G.s to be precise) due to background noise from trucks on the road, made the thinking process difficult.  For each time I had to repeat what I had said before the N.G., my answers came out very differently! 

Alas, after watching the programme, none of the essential questions were aired anyway... ah well...

In case you missed the programme, here is the link to the show. I am very happy to be sharing this segment together with my fellow mom blogger friend, Jiahui from www.mumseword.com, who was also interviewed for this segment. And thanks to her for putting up this direct video link on the 'sharenting' portion for my readers to enjoy!

 

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If you are also a parent blogger like me, I invite you to share your thoughts on sharenting and link me up!

Why do you blog? What is it you want to share with the public? And what is it you wish to achieve?

(You may use the above questions posed to me as a guide for your post.)

Copy and paste this badge at the end of your post!

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  Till the next post, have a blessed week!

Why, Yes. I Send My Kids To Tuition.

Flipping through the newspaper this morning prompted me to write this post where this is a hot topic raised on a national level. More so when I read a letter in the forum section by a mother which read "Tuition not necessary for good grades".

I have valid reasons for sending my children to tuition. If there wasn't any need to, I don't think I want to spend the additional money on extra classes, nor the extra time spent on ferrying/waiting which could have been better spent in quality.

As I go along in this post, I will be extracting certain portions of her letter and share how I personally feel about what was written.

"My elder daughter took her Primary School Leaving Examination last year and was among the top 10 per cent in her cohort." 

Well in this instance, I'm happy for her as a parent, who has a self-motivated and disciplined child that she need not worry about. For all we know, her daughter is just naturally born gifted and if I have children like that, I would be the least worried about her academics. 

My children are not academic ambitious, as much as I would like them to. Though this is not the reason why I send them for extra classes. 

Currently, my son in secondary one has no tuition as he already has a packed schedule with CCAs, coming home about 6pm almost everyday. It would be cruel to take away the precious time he has left to spend at home with the family, play and tackling homework each day. So I am just holding my breath that he will be self-motivated enough soon to be responsible with his revision and hope that he pulls through the weaker subjects. 

"I was shocked when my younger daughter told me recently that she was probably the only one in her class who did not attend tuition classes. Some of her classmates had two tutors for each subject, making it eight teachers for four subjects."

I am equally appalled by the sharing of the second sentence. Now this is absolutely kiasu, I must say. But then again, every child is different. And you may be surprised by how much a child can love tuition this much! No kidding! In fact, I've heard of a minority who thrive on tuition better than in school!

For us, we made the decision to send ours for tuition on their weaker subjects in school. Namely mother tongue which I wrote before on the challenges they face. Mathematics is another core subject they both can tackle however, as it is a difficult subject for me to guide them from home since there are changes to the way problems are being solved, I am not confident on giving advise on the topics as they progress. My husband would help if he is home however, we feel that they need a tutor whom they can tap on with proper resources, lest we give the wrong advice since we are not equipped with the current syllabus. So a tutor comes into the picture. It is not about having a tutor who gives more homework. It is about a tutor who can guide and explain what they do not understand from school and customize their learning journey if necessary. With understanding comes knowledge. When knowledge is applied properly, doesn't everything just fall into place?

"If teachers are doing their job, pupils are attentive in class and parents are doing their best to motivate their children and supervise their schoolwork, then there is no need for tuition to ramp up one's results."

I am very sure our teachers are doing their job. In fact, I think it's a very tough job to have to maintain everyone's undivided attention in class and ensure that every child registers what he/she teaches. In reality, I believe not everyone would. Just like my children who would sometimes let their minds drift away during class. This was what their teachers feedback.

For us, it is not so much to "ramp up one's results".  It is about being given individual attention in a small group tuition setting so that they can ask whatever without feeling the need to be embarrassed, as compared to a class of 40 in school. With this personalized setting to address their specific needs, they will grasp the topic better and would help them tackle the challenges. They still don't score exceedingly well but marked gradual improvements, even if its just by 5-10 marks, do make a difference in the grading system. Key point to note here is "improvement" or the very least, "maintenance". Not about the A stars. Though that would be a bonus!

"More importantly, not attending tuition classes gives my children an invaluable asset - the ability to allocate more time for family bonding."

Absolutely agree. However, as parents, we also cannot feign ignorance if we see our child struggling with a subject in school and recognize that they need the extra help. I feel that any parent will decide what is best for their children so that quality time will not be compromised.  

It is also times like this that I am glad to be a stay-at-home-mom because I am able to schedule their tuition on weekday afternoons without much disruption. I am an advocate of quality time with the family and determined to give my children a balanced life. Ultimately, what is most important is that we know our own childrens' needs and as parents, we must step in to address them. If we don't, who will? It is definitely not a one-size-fits-all kind of situation.

  Till the next post, have a blessed week!

Linking up with :

 

The Vow

Tomorrow marks my 16th year of marriage.   As they say, it's great to find someone special you can annoy for the rest of your life. I think, we both found ours.  

 
A wedding anniversary is the celebration of love, trust, partnership, tolerance and tenacity.  The order varies for any given year.  ~Paul Sweeney   Happy anniversary to us!  And many more years to come.   Till the next post, have a blessed week!