The Key to an SAHM's Sanity

Of all the jobs in the world, they say a stay-at-home-mom's (SAHM) job is the toughest one. We are expected to run the household and multi-task. Nothing can prepare us for this job. We learn to go with the flow (not exactly smooth ones) and are expected to wear many hats at home. We help ourselves solve specific tasks, as much as possible. Those without external help would know what I mean. It's not so much of physical tiredness. It's just.... emotionally draining.

The many sleepless nights with my bubs at this stage, as I was nursing both of them concurrently.

Having been a SAHM for the last 13 years, there are possibly many things that I could have done to better manage my well-being, IF I had known better. Opportunities to manage the burnout feeling I felt at the end of the day was too insignificant to remember that I am being appreciated at home. I was an angry, grouchy and emotional mom in the earlier years. My identity was lost until my children went to school. Only then I could find a little bit more time to myself to pursue my interests.

Selfies did exist in the year 2004! :p

So listen up, all you new SAHMs out there, especially with the younger bubs who are not yet in school. This is really really important to have.

Looking back, I think it would have been perfectly alright to ask for some time off, to remember there is a 'me'. Moms are the reason for the existence of our children and I don't see why SAHMs should not take regular healthy time-offs to recharge and be energized. Wouldn't it be nice to go home feeling ready to face new challenges and embrace our family with a more loving and positive mind?

So whether you can squeeze in some time off to have a meal alone (without having to eat leftovers), get a hair wash at your neighborhood salon, bake a cake - anything that will make you feel on top of the world. Do it. You will appreciate yourself more. Your family would too.

Here's a recent photo of us enjoying each others' company! When they are older, things get much easier despite teenage angst. That's another story for another day. :)

  Till the next post, have a blessed week!

Next up on the blog train!

Pauline, a mother-of-two, a home cook, a baker and a crafter. She has been a SAHM for almost 7 years now and she’s still enjoying every minute of being one. Days with the children, to her, are never dull and having a hobby or something interesting to be kept busy with makes life so much more easier. Beyond her interest in cooking, baking and sewing, blogging keeps her sane as she shares with many like-minded moms about her struggles, moments of pride and everything in between, so visit her blog tomorrow to find out more!

This post is part of a blog train hosted by Gingerbreadmum where 31 stay-at-home mums share their survival tips. We hope that you'll find our tips useful and remember that you're not alone!

Dinosaurs : Dawn to Extinction @ Artscience Museum, Singapore

Image extracted from the museum's website.

If you, like our family, are curious about history and archaeology findings, you will certainly not want to miss the latest exhibit at Artscience Museum. "Dinosaurs : Dawn to Extinction" gradually takes us back in time, journeying through 600 million years to the Triassic, Jurrassic and Cretaceous prehistoric periods. It is the largest dinosaur exhibit in South East Asia.

 

 

We had an excellent docent guide, Anita, who brought us around the exhibition. My children followed her closely and listened intently as she shared stories and  fascinating facts of the world of dinosaurs, as we relive the dinosaurs' natural environment on earth with each showcase. It was made even more interesting for my children with a free interactive mobile app for iphone and android users, to uncover more facts and visuals during our journey. There was never a dull moment!

We were awed by the life sized replicas and fossil displays which were centred throughout the exhibit.

This gallery of a battle scene, is probably the most breath-taking, with it's dramatic atmosphere.

I was also very intrigued with this particular section, where Anita shared how these fossils (below, encased) were discovered and kept intact despite going through rough terrain obstacles, before it was shipped to Singapore. The whole process was sponsored by ArtScience Museum as the fossils makes it's debut appearance here. A major wow.

In selected galleries, depicting the different prehistoric periods, there are also touch and feel settings to engage the adults and children alike, to discover more about the dinosaurs.

 

 

 And what's a dinosaur exhibit without the much loved T-rex? We learned from Anita that humans are able to outrun the T-rex, if ever such circumstance is called for. It seems they can only run for up to 16 km/hour. That's when many will ask how is it so when in the Jurrasic Park movie, it almost outruns the jeep? Well, Anita says "That's Hollywood for ya!"

 

  One of the final exhibits to mark the end of the dinosaur era. A display of the Liaoning Forest in China, where biodiversity takes place and prosper in land, air and sea.  

  We also finally learned the truth about how dinosaurs became extinct! And no. It's not because of a meteor story that we are familiar with.   

If you have dino-loving children or you are a dino-buff yourself, a visit to this exhibit at ArtScience Museum will  be worth your while! The exhibit will be held till 27th July 2014. Be prepared to go through the exhibit more than once because there is a lot more to see than what I'm showing you in my post. *wink* You will definitely not be disappointed!

Activity Highlights

There are numerous activities lined up for everyone in the family! Children can look forward to making their own dinosaur shadow puppets to take home or become a Paleontologist for a day! There's also fossil sketching, dinosaur tales, sculpting a soap, etc to look forward to. These are free activities for all open ticket holders. Please check with the museum directly for session timing so that you can plan and make the most of your visit.

Dinosaurs : Dawn to Extinction (now till 27th July 2014)

Standard Ticket price
Adult : S$24  Senior Citizens : S$19  Children : $12 (2-12 years old)

Guided Tour Times
English : Saturdays and Sundays | 11.30am & 5pm

Mandarin : Saturdays & Sundays | 2pm & 4pm
(I strongly recommend to go for a guided tour and then explore the exhibits leisurely on your own after that.)

Opening hours
10am - 7pm daily

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If you have no plans for a vacation this coming March school holidays, why not consider spending some time with your children at the museum? Here is an activity schedule you can consider!

March School Holiday Programme 

 'Dinosnores'

There will be a parent-child sleepover with the dinosaurs at ArtScience Museum for the week-long March school holidays on 16 and 21 March 2014. A first for the museum! It promises an action-packed night with movie screening and interactive workshops to engage everyone.

S$120 per child participant (accompanying parent is free). 

Registration is now open and you can do so through the Marina Bay Sands ticketing hotline 65-6688-8888, online and box offices. Or call the museum +65 6688 8826 to find out more.

Other holiday activities to consider :

17, 19, 21 March 

1-2pm : Dinosaurs : Dawn to Extinction guided tour

4.30-5.30pm : A Day in the Life of a Paleontologist demonstration

18 & 20 March

1-2pm : Dinosaurs : Dawn to Extinction guided tour

2-3pm : Guided tour in mandarin

3-4pm : Dinosaur vs Mythical Dragon workshop

4.30 - 5.45pm : Stop Motion Dinosaur Wipe-out! workshop

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Till the next post, have a blessed week!

Disclaimer : The Accidental Mom Blogger and family were invited as media visitors to this exhibit hosted by ArtScience Museum.  All views are entirely my own. Information provided is correct at time of post.

Our Reunion Dinner Tradition

 

Apart from our casual get-together for dinner, we make it a point as a family, to meet with our elders and siblings for meals during important occasions. There is certainly no exception when it comes to the reunion dinner during Chinese New Year's eve, as we gather to usher in the new year together, for happiness and prosperity for every member of the family. It is the simplest form of family tradition that I personally cherish and hope to instill this importance to my children, so that they learn the values that has been passed down from generation to generations.What makes our reunion dinner more joyous is having the extended family (aunts, uncles and cousins) join us for this important dinner at the home shared by my mother-in-law and sister-in-law. It certainly makes a good celebratory atmosphere!

Food is, no doubt, an integral part in our Chinese new year celebrations. A s I am married into a traditional Cantonese family, the home cooked food that is prepared during reunion dinner are often "auspicious" dishes. Here are some of the significant dishes we had.

 "Yu Sheng" or raw fish salad. In Cantonese, they would call it "lao yu sang". This dish, represented by the above Chinese phrase, "feng sheng shui qi", brings forth success, prosperity and vitality towards the family, the whole year through. The higher you toss, the better it gets!

In Cantonese, prawns are pronounced as "har". So it is very apt that the above phrase "ha ha da xiao", brings forth laughter and joy for the family throughout the year.

"Fatt Choy" - or prosperity, as the black moss seaweed is called. It is usually braised with dried oysters with black mushrooms, however, the one you see here is with sea cucumber, which is pronounced as "hoi sum" in Cantonese, meaning "happiness". You would be able to guess the significance behind this dish - yes! It is for all to have wealth and happiness throughout the year!  

A snap shot of our extended family, tossing "yu sheng" at my mother-in-law's home!

 

**************************************************************************************

What does reunion dinner means to you?

Watch this heartwarming video clip by the National Family Council (NFC), showing realistic stories and thoughts about what some Singaporeans think about reunion dinners.  Through this video, NFC hopes to encourage everyone to reflect on the significance of family reunions and spend more time with our loved ones, creating memories and building stronger bonds.

With the reunion theme in mind, the National Family Council is organizing contests in relation to Chinese New Year reunion dinners and the significance it has for different people. Share your thoughts at their facebook page and stand to win attractive prizes!

**************************************************************************************

  From our family to yours, we wish you :  

"家和万事兴"  (jia he wan shi xing) Meaning : A harmonious family will prosper.  And may all blessings be upon you and your family throughout the year of the horse.   Till the next post, have a blessed week!

Disclaimer : The Accidental Mom Blogger was invited to share the objective of the National Family Council. My family and I support it's vision to foster stronger family ties in Singapore.  A token of appreciation was presented to us for writing this post. 

2013 - A Year of Gratitude

As I get older, I am more mindful of the little things in life that truly matters to me. One of the most essential to "living life to the fullest", is choosing (as much as I can) to stay positive and think of the happy moments instead of focusing on the negative ones. I've always believed that happy thoughts generate happy cells in one's body. Sicknesses are somehow kept at bay and happy vibes infects people around you too. Happiness is truly not something you can place a price tag on.

Looking back at 2013, there are many little things I am grateful for that made my year a memorable one.

• Watching my 13 year old son gain some independence after starting secondary school. I can now run my necessary errands and leave him to come home on his own and settle his own meals. It is a little load off my mind.
• My husband and I celebrated 16 years of marriage. Though we've never celebrated it in any fanciful or romantic way, I am happier that he takes the time to plan and take the family for a few short getaways this year. Vacation time with the family often means a lot more to me than one candle light dinner.
• Reminding myself why I love what I do - keeping my lifestyle jewelries creations affordable. It's really not about the money, money, money! It's the passion that keeps what I do, alive.
• I had my first makeover! Well only on the face but there was much to learn from the session hosted by Florinda. It was a fantastic time spent with women I know!
• I never thought there will be a day that I will gather ingredients and prepare an oreo mud pie! If not for my little girl's request, I don't think I would. I hope she realizes that the little things I do for her is out of love.
• Now, if you know me, I am TOTALLY NOT a night owl. But for a late night date with my hubby, I did it. We went for an extraordinary date to Senoko Fishery Port!
• The kids and I also made out debut on TV for a programme interview on why I blog. Even though the airtime was very short, it was the experience that mattered.

As we usher in 2014 in a few hours, I pray for peace, health and happiness to continue to reign within the family. And a special wish to all my readers for the same blessings for your families too.

Cheers to 2014!

 

  Till the next post, have a blessed week!

Sights and Tastes in Penang

Photo taken with my iphone 4S, from the room balcony. As we watched how the ship was skillfully docked.

We just got back from a little vacation in a cruise ship with friends and docked off at our first stop in Penang. The time spent in Penang was barely 5 hours but it didn't stop us from going out to explore George Town! Well, in fact, we were just being typical Singaporean foodies and yearned to chomp down some good local food!

An interesting nostalgic sight for me to capture on my camera.

We were lucky that one of our travel companions, originates from Penang so he knew his way around. It was about an hours' walk from the pier (with a short detour to get some tau sah piah and a stop to poke our noses into a local chocolate museum) when we arrived at this old school coffee shop located at Libuh Keng Kwee lane, that was famous for their char kway teow. We were so darn lucky that we managed to order the last 6 plates for the day, before they turned everyone else away! And it was only 5pm.

The infamous char kway teow lady boss in action. I was told she is a fierce one!

What we came here for... mmmm I can still imagine the taste lingering in my mouth! Extremely worth the walk!

 Within the coffeeshop,  there was also the mouth-watering Assam Laksa.

Oh man! Look at that "hae gor" (fermented shrimp sauce). Still drooling.

And also the lor bak! 

Last but not least, we also sampled the chendol, sold at a roadside stall - which was apparently as famous. Very simple ingredients of the green jelly and red bean but thirst quenching and yummy nonetheless.

Satisfied Singaporeans.

Right after the meal, we headed back to the ship. Yep. We were that hardcore for the local food!

Captured this image along the way back.

And learned that Jimmy Choo originates from Penang as well!

Albeit the short hours in Penang, we felt our food hunting mission was completed. 

I shall be sharing what we did in Phuket, in another post. Stay tuned to find out what you can achieve in Phuket with the older children in one day. Guaranteed to make them really happy.

  Till the next post, have a blessed week!

Things To Do @ Downtown East

We checked into Costa Sands Resort and escaped home for 2 nights earlier this week since it was the schools' September term break, but mostly to be away from the noise and mess since we were overhauling our master bedroom. Yes, overhaul! Because the previous contractor did not do a good job with the waterproofing of our bathroom and wreaked havoc on our laminated floor and built-in wardrobe.

We were not duly disappointed even though we visit Downtown East very often, it was different to be staying over and hanging out with the family without worrying about time, what to do and what to eat because they have everything to entertain us as a family!

The cozy room that we had with the basic amenities. I wished the beds were a tad less hard though!

Here's what we did to keep our children entertained and have some family fun apart from going back home now and then to monitor the renovation.

DAY #1 BOWLING & SWIM

DAY #2 

The kids caught up with their homework from school in the morning and had their favorite choice of breakfast.

 We went to Wild Wild Wet in the afternoon, mostly to please our resident adrenalin junkie!

Images taken from Wild Wild Wet site

Some of the slides and rides they covered. Urm, ok I'm no water babe of any sorts and certainly don't look like one. I was happy just to hang around the Tsunami and Jacuzzi but was convinced to try the Ular-lah. I screamed... and screamed some more while the three of them hummed to the smurf tune. Yep! That's my family for you, if you must know. Ah well, as long as they were entertained. -__-
 

We had an impromptu barbeque at the resort since the weather that evening was fabulous and caught up with a couple of friends, who were living in the area. We were glad that the convenient shops there had all our barbeque needs - including marinated meats so we needn't worry about the hassle of preparing the food!

It has been a good few days spent. I'm very happy to see my children enjoying the time together as a family - with no computer distraction. It is moments like these that makes me feel blessed to be a part of their lives and reminds me how far I've come in my motherhood journey.

  Till the next post, have a blessed week!

The Struggle With Mother Tongue

Mother tongue. Mandarin, to be precise. Have you had any trouble with the language? I did, back in school and now, the occasional conversation I have with foreign talents and school teachers - not so much with the general Singaporeans.

I was born in a speaking English family, during the early 70's. Not a word of mandarin was spoken until I was exposed to the language in kindergarten.  My 2 older brothers took 'Bahasa Melayu' as their second language right from the start. As for me, the option to switch the second language subject was given to me when I was in primary 2. However, as soon as I was given the opportunity to try at the Malay language, I backed out. Somehow, I was just afraid I would be worst off. Furthermore at 8 years of age, I was thinking how cool it would be when I would be the only one in the family that knew the chinese language and my family will not know when I am sharing a secret over the phone!

And so my struggle with the language was apparent ever since. The only time I got to use the spoken language was when I was playing with my neighbors and thanks to them, I picked up the conversation part fast. 99% of the time, my test scores hovered between D and F. Which was really bad. Thankfully, though my dad was a teacher himself, he had never once pushed me to master the language or had high expectations of me. But I can also see why. He knew I was not a slacker when it came to school work. He knew I worked hard and gave my utmost best. He knew I was a responsible student. I had no stress, so to speak. I only wish I possess this positive trait of him so that I can also exercise the same with my children now.

Mandarin has gotten difficult to master, in my opinion. There's more emphasis on oral to see if you can express your thoughts with more "flowery" words these days. The things my children learn in school is a far cry from what I learned. Though I help them in the language department at home, many a times, I find myself fumbling with the words they don't understand and in the end, we find them out together. And I learn new words.

A sample of what Brandon is learning in secondary one. Now seriously, if there wasn't any interpretation in English here, I wouldn't even know half of them nor have heard any of my friends using them in our conversations!

Brandon did pretty okay with mandarin in primary school. He had gotten his share of A's', B's', C's', D's' and F's' as he climbed the levels. Like Megan, Brandon has had enrichment in the language since primary 1. As one who struggled with mandarin, I identified the need to reinforce on this subject for the both of them since we too, speak English at home, 80% of the time. Both of them dislike doing their chinese homework but there is truly little we can do but to force encourage them to stay focus as much as possible because we all know, how a mother tongue subject can make or break you, if you are taking the path to junior college.

Do you know primary school kids with learning disabilities, like dyslexia, can apply to be exempted from exams on this language? This one, I am totally supportive and agree that another language will impede their learning. Children who have been away from Singapore for an extended period of time and rejoining the local school's system, can also be exempted from the subject on the basis that they were not exposed to the language. So, even though these kids will take 3 subjects instead of 4 during PSLE, their aggregate will be adjusted accordingly to be on par with those who take 4 subjects so that they don't lose out.

First thought : unfairness. That's because I know MANY children in Singapore are struggling with their chinese language, yet, they are penalized if they score low on the subject. If they barely pass or fail their paper in PSLE, their T-scores will be grossly affected.  Yet, those who can be exempted on terms other than having disabilities, are able to obtain even higher aggregates with 3 subjects, versus a child that takes 4 subjects and fail one. I do know of some who managed to be exempted after spending a lot of money to take a series of tests by psychologists, be identified as being 'slow learners' in the language thus disadvantaged if they take a 2nd language.

Though Brandon's PSLE is over, next year will be Megan's turn. This is the only subject that I see my children struggling with which they are encouraged to embrace. How then, can we instill the love for this language to our children if all they see is a stumbling block in their academic pursuits? If only the weightage of the second language is not as high as the other subjects, perhaps it would lessen the burden for those who struggle.

As I type this post, there is a tinge of heaviness in my heart to see Brandon having a harder time with his mother tongue at secondary school. His teacher will be recommending that he goes to a 'CLB' syllabus from next year onwards. If we accept this change, it would affect his entry to a junior college (JC) if he decides to take that route. Because it is not a standard chinese paper, it won't be considered as part of his total aggregate though it is still a criteria to pass the chinese paper to apply for a place in JC. According to his teacher, it will not be difficult to obtain a pass in CLB syllabus. The only disadvantage is that the ultimate scores will have to come from the rest of the subjects. In other words, he will need to score A's'.  If we decide against taking this recommended syllabus, he may not pass and will hate the subject even more. As much as I wish he can pursue the standard paper, I think the right thing to do is go with the flow and pray that he will be led to where he needs to go.

This matter has taken a toll in our relationship of late. The expectations. Losing patience. The raging teenage hormones...put them altogether and you get a volcano just waiting to erupt at 10 on a richter scale. But we will all stay positive during trying times. Life is about crossing hurdles. Whatever the outcome may be, I will keep the faith that it will all turn out well and for the better. More importantly, I just want my babies to be happy!

  Till the next post, have a blessed week!

Linking up with :